I'll post pictures of my new guitar stuffs when I have a camera and the time to do it.

Until then, I'll play as play can.

I'm bored and I haven't posted anything, so... it's time for a list! Gentlemen... BEHOLD!

20 Things That You, The Customer, Can Do To Make Me, The Employee, Want To Rape You In THE FACE

1) Tell Me How To Do My Job

No, it's alright... it's not like I've been trained for this job or anything. Please tell me how I should be doing things so that I can better serve you, the obviously enlightened customer. No, it's fine, here's the broom - go ahead, sweep.

2) Give Me An Attitude

So I understand someone pissed in your Cheerios this morning. It's quite alright, then, for you to give me shit for not being able to magically get you out the door and on with your obviously aggravating life. I don't mind at all.

3) Use Selective Hearing

I guess you didn't hear me the first twenty times - we can't give you a return on your item if you don't have your receipt. I don't mind being asked another dozen or so times what you can do about your obviously understandable and frustratingly simple problem with us. I don't need you to understand, so long as you're happy.

4) Let Your Kids Use My Store Like A Playpen

You're a single mother with four kids. I get it, you're overworked, underpaid, and most likely half-covered in vomit and kid germs. So it's cool if all four of your kids take items from shelves and throw them in the middle of the aisle or climb around on everything without you saying a word.

5) Enter The Store At The Last Minute With No Intention Of Leaving

We closed at 10:00 PM, but since you came in at 9:58 PM, I guess it's okay if you shop for another 30 minutes or so.

6) Decide You Don't Want Half Your Cart Items At Checkout

It's okay if you consider the checkout aisle as a continuation of your shopping trip. I don't mind having to take half the store back to restock the shelves, because I really hate you giving me just one item you've changed your mind about.

7) Realize You Need To Get Money After I Announce The Total Cost

No, you don't need to pay money for what you're trying to buy. Just keep that unorganized purse hidden until the last second.

8) Say "How Are You" As A Social Necessity And Not Out Of Courtesy

I didn't really plan on responding to your question, I knew you were just asking because you ask people about their lives out of the need for small talk instead of courtesy. So, please, interrupt me answering.

9) Tell Me Why A Store Rule Is Stupid

Yeah, I get it, you don't like a rule, but it's okay to take it out on me. After all, I, the new hire, wrote those rules to your chagrin.

10) Tell Me What Something Costs

You must've worked here longer than me, so I guess I should just take your word on the cost of whatever the hell you're handing me.

11) Beg And Plead For A Discount On Items With Minor Wear

So the price tag has a tear in it and the corners of the packaging are a little worn. You're right, that's grounds for a 20% damage discount... silly me!

12) Use The Restroom... Without Using The Restroom

It's cool you pressed your asscheeks against the wall and took a big shit all over it, and then pissed in the trash can. I dig it. I know it's hard to make it to the toilet when it's in the same small room.

13) Ask To Look Closely At Dozens of Top Shelf Items

I've got nothing better to do than get out the ladder and move down an entire aisle, pulling every similar item that catches your eye. Let's get started.

14) Steal

You really need that home phone. Go ahead, take it.

15) Ask Me Questions While I'm Helping Someone Else

No, your needs are more important than the jackass I'm helping. Ask away.

16) Block The Entire Aisle With Your Cart

I don't need to get by you to do any work, and neither do any of the customers around you, so go ahead - use up all the space you need and take your time.

17) Refuse To Acknowledge My Existence During An Entire Transaction

Hello? Hello? Oh, okay, you don't care about the people that serve you, as long as you're out of the store 20 seconds faster.

18) Use My Store As A Trash Bin

We have people that are paid to clean the store. It's fine if you leave food wrappers or cans or trash bags or newspapers lying around - we'll pick up after you.

19) Ask Me Inane Questions

The answer to your 2 minute long question is on the front of the package, but that's okay. Your reading comprehension difficulties are something I'm paid to work around.

20) Swipe Your Card A Billion Times

When you swipe your card the first time and I'm still ringing up items and it doesn't work, do it again. If it continues not to work, keep swiping. I'm sure it'll work eventually - when I key your payment type in, for example.